taking pot shots

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

LOS ANGELES (AP) … Television talk shows took aim Monday at Vice President Dick Cheney's accidental weekend shooting in Texas of a hunting companion. Here's a few of the jokes.

"Late Show with David Letterman", CBS:

- 'Good news, ladies and gentlemen, we have finally located weapons of mass destruction: It's Dick Cheney.'

- 'But here is the sad part … before the trip Donald Rumsfeld had denied the guy's request for body armor.'

- 'We can't get Bin Laden, but we nailed a 78-year-old attorney.'

- 'The guy who got gunned down, he is a Republican lawyer and a big Republican donor and fortunately the buck shot was deflected by wads of laundered cash. So he's fine. He took a little in the wallet.'


"The Tonight Show with Jay Leno," NBC:

- 'Although it is beautiful here in California, the weather back East has been atrocious. There was so much snow in Washington, D.C., Dick Cheney accidentally shot a fat guy thinking it was a polar bear.'

- 'That's the big story over the weekend. ... Dick Cheney accidentally shot a fellow hunter, a 78-year-old lawyer. In fact, when people found out he shot a lawyer, his popularity is now at 92 percent.'


The Daily Show with Jon Stewart," Comedy Central:

- 'Vice President Dick Cheney accidentally shot a man during a quail hunt ... making 78-year-old Harry Whittington the first person shot by a sitting veep since Alexander Hamilton. Hamilton, of course, (was) shot in a duel with Aaron Burr over issues of honor, integrity and political maneuvering. Whittington? Mistaken for a bird.'

* * * * * *


Added later: Filched from dio - How to survive a robot uprising. Hilarious.

 posted by zyn :: 11:24 AM :: 0 Comments :: permalink


--------------------------------------------------------::--------------------------------------------------------