thursday hangover
filip is right; i'm not good at honesty. i've only ever been completely honest with one person, mainly because that person is the only one i've ever really trusted. i've dissembled so much i can no longer remember to whom i told what, and i'm not even sure what i tell myself is true anymore.
that changes now.
it's one thing to equivocate when everything is going smoothly and you're in control and you know what you're doing; but when somewhere along the way you've lost the plot, everything just kind of falls into confusion. we all have issues with self-esteem.
forgive me, for i have lied.
no more. to hell with prevarication, distortion, deliberate omission. honesty, as it turns out, is really important.
as is coherence, which i appear to be lacking.
it's not enough to just pick some random person and decide: this is it, this is the one, i have chosen and it is final. i don't believe in fate, but it's hard to ignore the call of destiny. maybe none of us are really free. but that's too easy, too irresponsible an answer.
i live for good conversations. that's my answer. for now.
posted by zyn ::
1:22 PM ::
5 Comments ::
permalink
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